The Best of Thai

One of the things I fell in love with in Thailand was the language.

First are the many English phrases that tourists here over and over again like, "kha," "no have," "have," "cannot," "can," "finish," and the overall Southeast Asian go-to of "same same but different." The reason the people speak like this in English, in most Southeast Asian countries, is because it is a literal translation of their language. Mai dai - cannot. Mai me - no have. Me mai - you have?

The politeness form used in every day language is "kha" if you are a woman, and "krab" if you are a man. Sometimes i would overhear phone conversations and every other word was kha or krab. It's yes, it's thank you, you're welcome, and simply serves as an overall respectful recognition of the other person.

My favorite thing about the language was the intonation. It sounded like something I would call a whine. Thank you was never just khabkhun kha, it was khabkhun khaaaaaa with a rising inflection on the last note of kha. It became less like a whine as time went on, and more like a song. After 6 weeks in the country I enjoyed using local phrases and intonations as a way of communicating. Tinglish. By the end I would just throw in "kha" at the end of every sentence. "Okay khaaaa!"

Although Thailand was not my favorite place in Southeast Asia, it was one of the places that felt like home. Everything there is communicable, convenient, and navigable. Most places are not far from a dusty city with a thai massage, motorbike rental, 7/11, and fried chicken nearby. What more could you need?

The north of Thailand, as well as Koh Tao, and Koh Lanta (islands in the south) were by far the best and most memorable parts of my experiences there. The people were friendly, the food was fantastic, the shopping was fun, the activities affordable, and the environment to meet people - both locals and travelers - was saturated. Bangkok was not my favorite place, not because it was a big city, or crowded with tourists, no, it was because the local people were obviously burnt out by tourists. On several ocasions I experienced unkind interactions among the tourist handlers, even locals deciding to ignore me when we were in the middle of a conversation. Truth be told, communication was exhausting and had to be extremely clear so as not to offend or insult, and even then, sometimes I would walk away as the one feeling insulted.

In 8 weeks, beginning from the North, I went to Chiang Rai, Pai, Chiang Mai, Sukhothai, Ayuttaya, Bangkok, Kanchanaburi, Bangkok (two week break for Myanmar followed by land border crossing to...), Mae Sot, Tak, Chiang Mai, Bangkok (for a 12 hr bus layover), Chumphon, Koh Tao, Surat Thani, Krabi, Koh Lanta, Koh PhiPhi, and Hat Yai before land crossing into Malaysia.

There was so much that I did and saw in Thailand, and it was the longest I have stayed in one country since I began traveling in 2014. Here's what stuck out the most;

Most Visited Place

7ELEVEN! Back to the land of convenience, where there are 7Elevens on every corner - making all of my first aid, beverage, and food needs easily met. The go-to for backpackers are the sandwich toasties, the cigarettes, and the Chiang beer. On top of this, 7Eleven has become such a cornerstone for travelers in Thailand, that a lot of the t-shirts sold on the street will simply have their logo on it to sell to tourists. The first time I saw a 7Eleven in Asia was in Thailand, and it was like finding the Holy Grail. Then I learned that the Holy Grail was on every corner. 

Best Shopping

It is a toss-up between the night market in Chiang Mai, and Khoasan Road in Bangkok. The clothing is so cheap, and usually the material was such good quality, that I couldn't go wrong. With the exception of the several pairs of shorts or pants that would continually rip on the same butt-seam - I had no shoppers guilt. I bought everything I needed, to the point that Thailand left me equipped with a new speaker system, new clothing, shoes, dresses, hats, sarongs, and everything in between. It was heaven on earth for someone who had been traveling wearing the same six items of clothing for eight months. My confidence was in need of a wardrobe change. Chiang Mai was cheaper than Bangkok, and in Bangkok the bargaining was not nearly as friendly as in the north. When push comes to shove, I still walked away with all that I needed.

Easiest Border Crossing

I entered Thailand from Laos, and also from Myanmar, and I left Thailand entering into Malaysia. BY FAR the simplest, easiest, and fastest border crossing was going from Laos to Thailand. It was also the saddest to be leaving behind such an incredible experience during my time there. 

Most Spontaneous Adventure

Almost all of my spontaneous adventures happened in Pai. One day, I went for a walk on my own and came back with my first tattoo. Another day, my friends and I were leaving a waterfall, and needed a taxi. I said it would be better to hitchhike instead of paying for a taxi - since pretty much everyone leaving the waterfall would be returning to the city. So, we hitchhiked, and the people who picked us up ended up being from the same group we met at a bar the night before. They gave us a ride back to Pai, and then to the canyon to watch the sunset together, and we continued a night of music and amusement from there.

Best Food

By far, green curry with chicken. There was one particular place in Mae Sot that changed my perception of green curry - forever. It was run by a middle aged couple and located in the center of town. There was nothing to do in Mae Sot, so after a day of walking about with a Spanish friend I made, we ran into the only restaurant open for an 8pm meal and it turned out to be the best Thai food of my life. An enormous vat of green curry, spicier than "Thai spicy" as requested, and filled with vegetables.

Cheapest Food

Pad Thai. Pad Thai all day, every day, anywhere, any time, for around $1.

Best Day Tour for My Money

The cooking class I took in Chiang Mai was deliciously memorable. My travel buddies and I went to the market to learn about the foods, and although I was strung out on only a couple of hours of sleep, I woke right up when the heat was turned on. It was interesting to learn about the spices, fruits, and vegetables that virtually don't exist in America. I got to learn how to cook my favorite Thai foods, spicy spicy. I don't mean to brag, but I basically make the best green curry ever. Thanks to our tiny upbeat chef making us laugh the entire class, it will definitely be unforgettable.

Not My Favorite Day Tour

While in Chiang Mai, some of my friends and I decided to head over to Tiger Kingdom to see the beautiful animals there. We all had read about the purity - or lack thereof - concerning these "sanctuaries" or "rehabilitation centers." At Tiger Kingdom were tigers, and even lions, locked in very small cages being photographed, and taunted by foreigners and workers alike. The Kingdom says that they "rescue" the tigers at a young age, rehabilitate them, and release them back into the wild at 2 years old. However, what grown ass Tiger is going to laze around while people playing with its tail and rubbing its backside? A drugged tiger. What baby is not going to try to playfully bite? A drugged baby. The feeling in the pit of my stomach at this place was not good. I paid the money to see the smallest tigers. I gave them as much love as I could ,and otherwise tried to observe the workings of the facility. I couldn't wait to leave. A month later, I learned that the sister-sanctuary run by monks outside of Bangkok would be closed because of abuse, and exploitation for tourisms sake.

Most Memorable Encounters

Me and My Sukhothai Lifesave, Mr Ng

In Sukhothai my friends and I borrowed bicycles to ride 14km to the famed ancient ruins in this small dusty town. After riding along the same route for some time, I sped up as much as I could, eventually looking back to see that my friends were no where in sight. I returned to where I saw them last, backtracking the same way, and still no where to be found. I had no internet or cellular reception to use. I had no idea what the name of my hostel, or the name of the ruins were. I had no idea where I was. Continuing on the path, I asked directions. No other city in Thailand gave me so much of a language barrier. I pointed, and used simple words. Most people directed me to the police station, which I went to. Eventually, I said to myself that I had no choice but to hitchhike. The heat was a desert, I had no water, and I just wanted to find my friends. This is the second of many times that I would hitchhike in Southeast Asia. I waved down a truck. The driver did not speak English. Luckily, there was a phone number on my bicycle for the hostel I was staying at. With some hand motions, the driver invited me into his car, put my bike in the trunk, and off we went for AN HOUR in search of my hostel. I will definitely remember Ng as my angel that day. When we finally arrived where I was staying, I offered him money that he refused. All he wanted was a selfie with me as a thank you. This is when communicating via laughter becomes a powerful tool in foreign travel.

Best Self-Employed Day Tour

While I was traveling on my own for a week in Kanchanaburi, I had met some Canadians and American who wanted to rent motorbikes. On our last day together we drove to Erawan National Park, where there are some killer waterfalls, and we made the drive up to Hellfire Pass for some World War II history and memorials. I suppose we didn't realize that the driving would take two times longer than google maps says, since we were on motorbikes. However, it was certainly a highlight to drive two hours to Hellfire Pass and walk the circuit of memorials in the valley there. We leisurely strolled through many Australian memorials and Western memorials. The powerful history of the abuse towards the Prisoners of War, from places like the United States, United Kingdom, Thailand, Vietnam, Myanmar, Malaysia, Australia, and New Zealand, really brought a spiritual and meaningful presence to the experience of walking through the place where thousands were killed. Why have I never learned about the Japanese in WWII and POWs before? Nazi Germany, and People's American History of the United States must have occupied all of my history courses. When the war was over, railway was not able to be used past a certain distance, and it was later destroyed. People slaved and died for it under Japanese regime, and then it was taken apart once repossessed by England. It was certainly heavy, educational, and memorable to be there. Simply learning about the conditions the POWs were living in brought tears to my eyes. After Hellfire Pass we drove another two hours around the National Park to the entrance, where we trekked through the jungle and swam in the waterfall for a short while before riding another two hours back to town and visiting the night market for dinner. This tour is offered by local companies, and costs over 1,000 baht. We did it for about 500 each. There is nothing like the wind in your hair while speeding along an empty highway with nothing but your thoughts and a destination. 

The view looking out over hellfire pass

Favorite Animal

My favorite animal in Thailand is, by far, the elephant. During my first visit in Chiang Mai, my friends and I day-toured to the Save the Elephants Wildlife Reserve. It is one of two reputable elephant sanctuaries in Thailand. It is the ONLY wildlife reserve that allows for the animals to roam free on many acres of land, feeds them, bathes them, and does not allow any other kinds of touching or riding. Hopefully, the government will eventually have a wildlife sanctuary to help save the elephants - for now the Thai gov't seems to keep its head down over the topic. The elephants we met were beaten, broken, and wounded by the life they had before they were rescued. Some of them were forced loggers, or forced into reproduction - essentially being put into a cage and raped by the male elephant for the benefit of people. All "domesticated" elephants in Thailand are taken at a young age from their mother, the wild, or both, and put into a cage that does not allow them to move - at all. While in that cage for three days they are tortured, stabbed, and beaten until they stop crying. My friends and I tearfully watched videos, during the tour, of the abuse that all "domesticated" elephants in Thailand go through. It's the concept that breaking their spirit will give them a new one, and that new spirit will do whatever its told. They wont cry or fight for their mother anymore. They will just shake from trauma, withstand the weight that they're bodies are not meant to hold - or they will be beaten more without restraint. Elephants are such soft, elegant, sensitive creatures. There was no way I could spend a day at this sanctuary seeing the abused elephants - some with permanent physical damage or emotional trauma - and not fall completely in love with these giant beauties.

Standing in front of the White Temple in Chiang Rai during sunset.

Most Profound Spiritual Experience
The most beautiful Buddhist temple I have ever seen was in Chiang Rai at the White Temple. The design of how the sun hit the white building and all of its mosaic bling - along with the actually enforced ambiance of silence and respect - made this place one of the most peaceful temples I have ever been to. 

Best Island

Koh Lanta. Low season was the best gift I could have received, and Koh Lanta was the deliverer. This conservative Muslim island was essentially abandoned during low season, so my friends and I had complete run of it. We did whatever we wanted, skinny dipped, sped around on motorbikes, slept anywhere, danced for no reason, climbed trees for coconuts - it was paradise. We were completely free. Between traveling with a group of high spirited loving people, the empty beaches, partial nudity, fast motorbikes, good and cheap food, and abandoned resorts, there was absolutely no way that I would change a second of my time there.



Most Rebellious Experience
While staying on Koh Lanta, my friends ventured to a rocky beach where a resort was locked up for the "off season." There they decided to set up camp for the night using mosquito nets and hammocks. The night before the campout we had a full BBQ, in the dark during a rainstorm. Using all of the utilities of this abandoned resort, we had shelter, an oven, a bathroom, and everything. It was probably the best trespassing decision of my life.

Best Party

For an every day party, I would say Chiang Mai had it going on. It was possibly my favorite city in Thailand. Every night all of the travelers would cultivate their little backpack community at Zoe's in Yellow - a local indoor/outdoor club taking up an entire block of the city. The best party, however, was celebrating the Thai New Year (Song Kran/Water Festival) for five days in Chiang Mai. All of the streets became a party. There was music blasting constantly, trucks of people with ice-water buckets stuck in traffic and attacking any passerby. The party started around 10am and ended at sundown, when everyone changed their soaking wet clothes, got cleaned up, and prepared to head out for a crowded dance-party at Zoe's. This went on for days. People wore raincoats and ponchos to drive through the city on their motorbikes. Tuktuks locked their windows. Everyone with a brain kept their phones in a waterproof sealed bag. Travelers coming and going during the festival had  to run through the streets so as to not get their travel bags soaked. Everyone had a water gun or bucket of some kind. It didn't rain at all during the entire festival, yet there was flooding half of a foot on some streets, and the road constantly looked as if a storm had just passed. There was no leaving your home unless you were prepared to get wet. People who were not in the spirit stalked up on food like it was the apocalypse so that they could survive without leaving their home. There was no way you wouldn't make friends, or be attacked by local children. There was just no way you could not have fun. So Tee Pee Mai! (Happy New Year)

SongKran by Day

SongKran by night

Best Hostel

The best hostel I stayed at, was hands down, Potae's guesthouse in Chiang Mai. Potae was a young lady who opened her business less than a year earlier. I would say that Potae and I became friends during the week that I stayed with her. She had everything, pods for beds so there was plenty of privacy, air con, small breakfast, directions and tours for anything and everything, and during the Songkran Water Festival she provided us all with buckets of water to dive into the Thai New Year with. She even hosted a night out with all of the hostel guests during the last night of the festival.

Proudest Accomplishment
I successfully received my Open Water Diver license. It has opened me up to an underwater world of possibilities in my future travels and adventures. Also, on my last dive of the course, I got to swim next to an enormous barracuda that you can vaguely see in the photo.

Best Sunsets
Nothing compares to the island sunsets

Most Memorable Moment
I had many many many memorable moments in Thailand. Getting lost with my Swiss and English friends in the dry jungle of Pai on our adventurous hike to a waterfall. Nights of dancing in Chiang Mai, and making loads of friends there. Reuniting with the same friends when I returned to Chiang Mai a month later. Diving in Koh Tao, and cliff jumping in Koh PhiPhi. The adventures of Koh Lanta, and the White Temple in Chiang Rai. Jungle walks, beaches, ancient ruins, border crossings, Khoasan Road, hospital visits, Royal City Avenue, temples. After its all said and done, the people I went on these adventures with added life to my day, and a skip in my step. They made the taste sweeter, the day brighter, the music smoother, the high higher, the laughter louder. My Swiss, English, Canadian, Kiwi, Danish, and Austrian friends are who I will carry with me in my heart forever. When it comes to Thailand, my most memorable moments will always have one of them in it.

London, England is the Heart

Today is a day for interludes - a shorter more cynical entry awaits you. Our spirits will lift after we leave London and if you continue to read you will understand why.

London is such a simple, overpopulated, tourist attraction of a city, and therefore it requires an interlude. After less than two days I grew tired of this bustling city. I lack gratitude for the melting pot of cultures, the accessibility of the tube, and the overpopulated walks through S. Kensington Park, Hyde Park, and the S. Bank. Buckingham Palace, though a site to see, still but a disappointment since onlookers are no longer allowed to approach the guards to play the game of trying to make them break position. All I wanted to do was wave my hands quickly in front of his face to make him blink. To my disappointment we are separated by a gate, or a rope, or a street performer dressed as Gandalf from The Lord of the Rings saying, "You Shall Not Pass" as he bangs his staff. I played make-believe as I stood in front of the gate disappointed: maybe years of thousands of tourists waving in the guards faces has forced some of them into retirement with post-traumatic stress disorder. Now in their retired lives, no one can wave to them, swat flies around them, or come within a foot of their face without them reliving the trauma of tourism. Hah

 I would appreciate the culture of London, if it had one. Unfortunately fish and chips are much to be desired, along with English beers, and eye contact after 8pm. I would say to steer clear of all of the above. 

The English drink Pimms is quite popular and tasteful. Its a fruity cocktail with vermooth, juices, and fruit. The English Sangria - it's much sweeter (in compensation for their terrible tasting beers.) Of all English foods and beverages, thats all thats worth talking about. Imagine leaving Spain and the only thing you had to say was, well the sangria was pretty good.

I have walked this entire city, and I disappoint myself that I cannot seem to find anything that I have grown to love about it. I just think, at least they make fried eggs better than the Irish. I like to crack my yolks not crumble them. I have a tendency to crack a yolk sometimes. Ho!

Despite my cynicism, I hypocritically say that I could imagine myself living here. It is easy to live here. There are so many walks to be done, and outer cities to be seen. Scotland is but a skip away. Everything is accessible, as it is in New York City, except for maybe 24 hour accessibility. Perhaps I can imagine myself living here because I have lived there. A fantastic city to live in, a somewhat obnoxious city to tour.

But then again, I'm not touring am I?

 ... am I?

Its an insult to New York, however, to compare the two. The Londoners and Europeans like to think that London is the European New York City, with its mimicking shopping districts, broadway shows, even an M&M factory in the center of Leicester Square. London, however, is not nearly as exciting, not nearly as spontaneous and organized, and not nearly as proud.

I'm learning quickly my likes and dislikes - I do not like cities, unless there are numerous views and walks along rivers or parks with plenty of personal space. In New York it was always easy to avoid crowds and live, at times, as if I was not even in a city.

---- Now heres where I switch gears from cynical to passionate. You'll notice - although I didnt do it on purpose and am only inserting this as an afterthought to reflect on my own self - that my writing instantly becomes more engaging and thoughtful. As with life, cynicism poisons our senses and makes us dumb. Read on and watch me gradually become smarter and for beauty to unfold. ---- 

Although I see London in wicked contrast of NYC, sadly they are similar in that London too has its fair share of racism. After a long day of rest, my brother (who has joined me for the next few weeks), a new Latino friend named Andre, and I, went to the Soho area to see what the nightlife of London was like. While walking about on a hunt for bars that didn't require a cover charge, we stopped suddenly at a street corner stood and watched. In front of us, a police car blocked the crosswalk, and I noticed that suddenly the white male officer was yelling at a group of black twenty-somethings who had just crossed the road behind the car. "Hey! What did you say to me?! Did you just call me a dick?" And he jumped out of his car with a swiftness, grabbed one of the young black men by the shoulder and said "what did you say to me?" The young man said, "I'm sorry, do I know you?" He had an American accent. The officer spoke closely and loudly to the mans face, and the man respectfully denied any such behavior. The officer then handed the young man off to a female officer who gave them all tickets. I felt ashamed for not saying anything - but weighing out my own risk; I do not know if the young man actually did anything (though I doubted it), and I cannot afford to be arrested or ticketed in a foreign country. Although, if I were kicked out of England for any reason and never to return, I might not mind it terribly. For a moment I thought that because I had white skin, I could say something and not be arrested. Sometimes we aren't meant to know if we did the right or wrong thing. Sometimes life just plays its film and we watch and we watch and we watch until we learn and we do things differently during the next scene - when it's our time to act.

Having also walked by Arab restaurants with smashed glass windows - one does not give naïve excuses for these observations.

You'd think in a "melting pot" such as London, that racism would be less, not more. After that, my opinion of London solidified, and I reflected on my own judgment. I am my own best critic. I always have a critique. A good critic never says "flawless" and never says "hopeless." I am neither, yet I am both.

After that it was time to leave London. My brother and I have made the most out of our experience having walked over two hours a day - every day - throughout this city. We've seen monuments, recognized the differences in cultures - the tube not the subway, the lift not the elevator - our biggest challenge being to make sure to look the proper directions when crossing the street, and to not throw toilet paper into the toilet. We can both navigate without a map now, and we both decided that an interlude from London to Brighton Beach would bring us to the true English culture and away from the city that we were growing distasteful of.

We woke up early, packed, and headed to the train station. After areiving in Brighton & Hove we walked down to Brighton beach, and passed dozens of Kebab shops - i instantly thought Yes! An Arab community! Unfortunately the racism of the city was a challenge to escape, with one of the Kebab shops locked up and closed due to several rock holes in the windows. Ignoring coincidence would be naïve. 

My brother and I sat in silence; tanning, drinking, eating, and laying on the pebbles that made the beach ground. My brother chose to rest, and take pictures of me while I rented a paddleboard for the first time in my life, on the rough and rocky English Channel. I was not so successful in standing for long due to the high white trulls, however, I did get to do some yoga on my board in between push-ups and paddles. I made sure to make it as much of a challenge as possible.
The water was a diarrhea brown color, and not very welcoming. "Merky" would be a compliment. Despite my efforts to avoid it, I fell in at the very end of my hour rental. At the end of the day, around 4pm, the water color appeared to be a clear green and blue - and so the color changed with the tides. I wondered if on the opposite side of the Channel - in Normandy, France - they received England's shit colored water with the incoming tide.

The Brighton Pier was fantastic. Down the stairs from the street to the beach, we immediately came across a boardwalk lined with shops, restaurants, a hookah lounge, merry-go-rounds, carnival games, and bars. I tried a cockle (sea snail) and sang Molly Malone to myself as I did, with cockles and bottles alive alive-O! Of course my brother and I ended our afternoon at the hookah lounge. After saying only a brief word in Arabic to the Egyptian owner, Adam, we sat and talked about his hopes and dreams. He was one of those people who had a hand in everything - he was a chef, a financial officer, a marketer, a shop owner - and all successful within the year that he immigrated away from his family in Egypt. From Egypt to England. I had instant admiration and curiosity. I wondered about his experience of Egypt at present, and why, perhaps, he was not put-off when we said we were American. I purposefully did not ask about Egypt - I did not dig deeper as I normally do. My brother suggested to me later that Adam became more open to us only after I entered into the conversation speaking Arabic. I thought; of course, everyone gets excited about their people, especially when they are far away from home. Its one of those universal responses.

On the Pier were two arcades where adults can win money and children can shoot make-believe characters and drive make-believe cars. There were dozens of snack and candy shops - apparently Brighton is known for their cream fudge, and rock candy (in all shapes and sizes). "Rock candy" is simply what they call rock hard candy - ho! At the very end of the Pier were the most exciting carnival rides I have ever seen at a beach. Akin to Coney Island. There were two rollercoasters with loops and all, along with several other fly-in-the-air-while-ya-twist-and-spin rides. The English Coney Island.

The prices for everything were fair, the people were enjoyable, the sun was out, I exercised - I could have stayed at Brighton Beach for the next week. Unfortunately, we hadn't planned on going at all let alone staying a night, so our day ended when the sun went down.

 We learned through locals and firsthand experience that when the night falls upon Brighton the "trashy white bloaks" come out, getting drunk and fighting whoever looks at them, or doesnt look at them, or breathes near them. Just as we began to experience some this, we woefully returned to London.

Suffice to say, Brighton Beach saved my perspective of England, despite the local reckless drunkenness. It was a fantastic day journey - and my brother now loves my spontaneous travel ideas and will follow me into whatever darkness or light I lead him. It is amazing to have him by my side even just for a moment, to experience what I experience, to know what I know, and to understand how I think about the world. And vice versa.

If I ever come to England again, I will go around the coast - everywhere but London. The beauty lies within the eyes, not within the heart. The heart is an organ, after all, it doesn't have emotion - the eyes do. The eyes are the window to the soul of a country the same as of a person.

London is the heart of England.